Blog 7: “Sweet Surrender – Rest as a Revolutionary Act”
Fly You Fools Series and 8 part series recovery from burnout and suicide |
Stronger Women®
🌐 www.strongerwomen.com
“Fly, you fools.”
The words Gandalf hurls with urgency as he falls into shadow in The Fellowship of the Ring are not just dramatic fantasy—they are a call to awareness for anyone working in trauma. Even when we think we’ve escaped danger, a tail-swipe from the burnout Balrog can still take us down. In this part of the journey, we consider what it means to fall—and to rise again, transformed.
🎶 Bread Songs for This Blog
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“Sweet Surrender” – For those learning to let go of overfunctioning.
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“Mother Freedom” – For reclaiming your right to live and rest.
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“It Don’t Matter to Me” – For surrendering shame and other people’s expectations.
The Crisis of Control
Helpers, healers, advocates—we often believe we must have all the answers. But control is a trauma response, born of our desire to make sure others don’t suffer the chaos we once did. As we serve others, our souls begin to disassociate from rest. We grow wary of stillness. But make no mistake: refusal to rest is not holy. It’s a wound.
Surrender Is Not Defeat. It’s Wisdom.
In her pivotal book Trauma Stewardship, Laura van Dernoot Lipsky invites us to ask: How do we keep doing the work we love without becoming the walking wounded? One powerful answer: We learn the art of sweet surrender.
This doesn’t mean giving up. It means giving over—to rest, to quiet, to Sabbath. When we refuse to pause, we become brittle. We no longer bend; we break. But surrender restores our softness, and in our softness, we find strength.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
— Matthew 11:28
The 16 Warning Signs of Trauma Exposure (Signs 13–14–15–16)
These next four signs can be the most dangerous—because they feel so normalized:
13. Anger and Cynicism
Chronic frustration at systems, loss of hope in change, or sarcastic detachment as a coping strategy.
14. Inability to Empathize
You’re numb. Joyless. You forget how to laugh or play.
15. Addictions
To food, work, screens, caffeine, control—anything that keeps you from feeling.
16. Inflated Sense of Work’s Importance
You believe you are the only one who can help, and you struggle to set boundaries or say no.
If you checked yes to these, you are not weak. You are not broken. But your soul is waving a white flag—will you surrender before collapse?
☕ Coffee & Drumming Metaphor of the Week
You can’t play a snare drum with a locked wrist. You need flexibility, rhythm, bounce. In the same way, your body, heart, and mind must learn the rhythm of rest. A strong espresso can jolt you awake—but it cannot sustain your soul. Sabbath must become your downbeat.
💡 Four Takeaway Tips: Sweet Surrender
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Name What You’re Avoiding.
Ask: What scares me about rest? What will I feel if I slow down? -
Practice a 10-minute micro-sabbath.
Silence, music, tea, or a slow walk—whatever gives your brain space to unclench. -
Say No Without Explanation.
Release the pressure to justify rest. It is your right, not a reward. -
Let Someone Else Drum.
You don’t have to carry the tempo alone. Let others help set the rhythm of your recovery.
✨ Dr. Brooke’s Reflection
I once believed rest was for other people. But burnout stole my joy, and suicidal despair nearly stole my life. Only through sabbath, surrender, and spiritual renewal did I learn to redefine my life. We are not machines. We are souls. And every soul needs rest to sing again.
📞 National Resources
If you or someone you know is struggling, please reach out:
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National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
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National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
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National Human Trafficking Hotline: 1-888-373-7888
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Elder Abuse Hotline: 1-800-677-1116
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